Going to See the Helen Keller House!

I'm still wet and of course today's forecast in Amsterdam is for heavy rain. I feel like this is a recurring theme in my life, kind of like a motif (I'm procrastinating a sequence analysis for film studies can't you tell?)

This week has been boring the past few days since a lot of people went home for reading week, guess its the equivalent of fall break although I wouldn't know since GW doesn't have one. I was supposed to Skype with my family last night and then I was offered the chance to go to the Holly Bush in Hampstead, the really "proper" English pub. Cider won out as usual so Cory if you are reading this that paper took forever to finish, ok good...

Until a few days ago I was unaware that Amsterdam is home to the Anne Frank house, which for some reason I always confuse with Helen Keller. Don't ask me why I just confuse them. Now that I'm thinking about it there are actually no similarities from which I should ever confuse the two. Oh well...

Well I need to buy some wooden shoes so I will be back in a few days!

I'm All Wet (Again)

So I forgot to mention this yesterday, but it has been rainy for the past few days in London. Having the luck that I have this means that my umbrella was destined to break, which it did. It basically just collapses on one side and the handle is unable to go down all the way. To quote The Hangover my umbrella is a "re-tard". So basically, once again...I'm all wet!

I have a paper due this week before I leave for Amsterdam on Friday, so naturally I took a trip to Narnia to get some work done. I am quite surprised I must say. I literally spend hours upon hours doing absolutely nothing procrastinating in my room and I think I got just as much work done in the library in two hours. After two hours and 1,000 words (out of 2,000 including footnotes) I had enough magical fun for the day and went back to Hampstead in the rain.

This has been bothering me for a few months now and I think I want to get it out, why exactly on the tube does the woman say: "Customers Blackfriars should alight at Temple and continue their journey at street level." Maybe it's just me  but I feel like you need some sort of preposition in between there such as "to" or "for" since two nouns back to back, in this case "customers" and "Blackfriars" makes absolutely no sense at all, where is the proper grammar there? And ever since Geoff stated that the term "way out" is weird I have started thinking the same thing for some reason. Oh and while we are on the subject of tube etiquette and grammar, this is a kind word of advice for all my non-English speaking friends: you stand to the right! And also, when playing music, headphones were invented for a reason, use them. I love how people claim not to know English and ignore the signs but listen to American music, so ironic.

I also got one of my papers back today and I simply do not understand the British grading system, which apparently is now going to be Americanized but still using their numbers. For example, a B is a 60-64, and A is a 70-79. Apparently if you get higher then an A you are like Einstein and should have your work published in Oxford.

And to show that I still pay attention to American news, I was informed that Alvin Greene called the DNC to ask how much it would cost to run for President. God help us everyone.

Hopefully I will stay dry tomorrow!

Pilgrimage to Harrod's

My first thoughts upon walking into Harrod's can be summed up as this: holy shit... I have never seen so much stuff under one roof ever in my life, most of which, at my current point in life I am too poor to afford. Let me give you an example, one of the cheapest things there, which I bought was a piece of goat cheese and spinach quiche for 1.95pounds. It was really good though so I suppose you do pay for quality. The cheapest thing we found in the store was a mini sausage roll for 50p (you get 8 for a pound at Morrison's). After being amazed by the variety of food they had in the food halls and I mean anything, we ended up walking into the ladies department since naturally I went with the girls. They had some nice watches in the jewelry section for men, too bad they started at 1000 pounds. The dress and shoe sections, well lets just say it looked like something Jill Zarin from RHONY would make Bobby buy her. These shoes were so expensive they were on display like they were in a museum. Price? Don't even ask, because if you need to it means you cannot afford it.

Since I wouldn't wear, let alone purchase any Prada or D&G women's clothing. I was way more interested in the pet section. They had the cutest 1000 pound puppies and a selection of hamsters and gerbils for quite cheap. They also had a pet salon. One dog no lie was getting massaged while another had its nails painted purple. If your dog needed exercise, they had a treadmill with 101 Dalmatians playing for your dog to walk
on.

After seeing the dogs get pampered we got in touch with our inner children and went to the toy section! I would like to thank my family now for spoiling me on Thomas the Tank Engine wooden trains as a child; saw the price tag, quite pricey. Apparently now they light up too and have censors so they know what other trains are near them so they can talk?! What happened to using your damn imagination! By this point we are all making a scene at the display of the toy pig that walks, snorts, and grunts, talking about how we want to buy one as our floor pig. I then see a guy making snow. Naturally I got in touch with my inner five year old and had to join in and make some.

 Finally we went to the men's department after some food. I found a really nice sweater that had an insulated vest built into it (if that makes any sense) by D&G. I really liked it, then I saw that it cost 995pounds. That was the end of that. Also there were some really nice shoes in the shoe department. I'm not cheap, but I when the cheapest pair is 150pounds, I think I'm gonna have to pass. Saw the Diana and Dodi Memorial. It's almost on the verge of being...shrine/cult..ish? The literally have what was believed to be the last cup she drank out of on display.

Then last but not least we went to the Christmas section! Nothing exciting, typical Christmas section but I thought I'd include it.

Check out the online store and the dress code (yes there is one to get in here)!

UFF!

Uff is quite possibly the greatest word that actually has no real meaning. Eve said everyone in Madrid says it for everything and now it is my favorite word to say too, so Londoners beware.

Peter Pan Statue

Friday was an interesting day which started with my War Studies session. I think Hermione may have had a coronary because he (yes the person I call Hermione is a girl) was just grunting when he got disgusted by peoples opinions and responses. This combined with the constant raising of his hands led to me laughing constantly, which I did not care about at this point. GW registration meant I missed my history class, and for once it went smoothly for the most part. One class that I wanted is currently restricted to majors only but life goes on. I would have rather sat and watched paint dry for an hour instead of go to history discussion because a) I find the TA to be pretty boring and way too philosophical in his approach to the British Empire and b) this girl I got put in a group with talks way too much. Guess the main theme I am trying to get at here is that I am not the biggest fan of brown nosers.



And this is where my weekend gets sooooooooo much better. First of all, I got my new laptop finally and then Geoff and Eve were in London so thats when the fun started! Our Friday evening consisted of a few bars and a "proper" indian meal. On the way to the resturaunt though a woman asked me if I was English, as in the nationality. Naturally Geoff and Eve said no, but I said kind of. She wanted to know where the Victoria tube station was. Well...given the fog in St. James's Park I could not see the sign that said where the station was, even though I knew it was close. I was so caught off guard because I realized "shit its really foggy". By response was, "Ok I'm not that English" and walked away.

Buckingham Palace

National History Museum

Now back to the resturaunt. Let me say for 12.50 this was a really good meal. We got a little bit of everything, what was in it...I am not too sure but it was really good. My favorite personally was the nan and the potato pancake like ball with the taziki-ish cucumber sauce. And in addition it was dinner and a show! Next to us was the most charming Scottish man who for the record was not drunk. He asked if we were American since he heard us talking. He LOVED America. He then went on to talking about how it was his favorite country (other then the UK) and asked us about our history. According to him FDR, Reagan, and Thatcher were his favorite US and UK leaders, and then by this point he fell out of his chair. But remember he wasn't drunk he just lost his balance. He then discussed that no one seems to like Carter because he didn't do much. He then ended his conversation by hand shaking our hands and asking that we continue the special bond and friendship because we are best friends. Naturally I said of course because I love the Brits and then he started singing what he claimed was "God Bless America". Awkward silence ensued because it wasn't the right song so I screamed "God save the Queen!" He said, "She needs it," and then he walked out the door.

With our poppies!

The next day was action backed with all the touristy things around London starting with the Science Museum. The best part by far was the interactive area despite the fact that we were way too old to be in there and probably should have been asked to leave. Then Eve played "Energy Ninjas" which I swear is indoctrination because it was trying to get you to recycle and rat out your neighbors for buring garbage or something like that. That was followed by Buckingham Palace, the Diana Memorial (which I found this time), and some Bergs and Mash for lunch with some cider. While at Hyde Park we found the Perter Pan statue. This is a public service announcement to all parent: Don't let your kids just climb all over statues, especially when people are trying to take pictures, and especially don't go over to get them off the statue and then proceed to show them every animal that is covered on the statue.

Then we finally found some poppies so we fit in. The Brits wear them to comemorate WWI basically. Eve and Geoff got the whole story from some guy when they landed so I'm gonna go with it. With our poppies freshly pinned on our coats we were then off the the Tower of London, Harrod's, and Abbey Road. Abbey Road...is full of traffic...so I don't know how the Beatles were able to cross the street. I got an OK picture trying to do so. And finally after weeks of epic build up I finally FINALLY had some fish and chips with them at The Flask in Hampstead. It was really good, and thank god the tartar sauce was good because if it was that crap from Morrison's I bought I would have been pissed.

Abbey Road

I was a wonderful weekend to say the least. Uff!

Chillin With My Boys Churchill and Earl G

I am so sick of sasuage rolls, their novelty kind of wore out after the like tenth one that I've had in the past week or so. I swear in some ways I am losing my sanity here. I walked into Tesco and saw that they are selling a single Krisy Kreme donut for £1.20 and just laughed. Like really, I was standing there all by my lonesome just laughing because there is no way in hell anyone in the US would ever pay the about $1.80 equivalent for a friggin glazed Krisy Kreme donut. Those are the thing you buy in a pack of a dozen for like $5 from kids trying to raise money going to Peru, when you're commuting to work, outside the metro. Oh and if you wanted a really nice fancy donut it was at least £2. Then were talking $3. Gotta love the 17.5% VAT.

Today GW took did something touristy with us, aka I had a full decent meal. We went to the Churchill War Rooms. Which were really cool to see seeing as Churchill is my boy and all. Sad thing is my laptop isn't here yet so I can't upload the pics. That was one massive underground complex the Brits had to keep the government going during WWII. Then before we went to the National Portrait Gallery I walked over to St. James Park. I was watching this lady feed the ducks that were across the fence and I noticed one on the other side of the path. I thought to myself, "ok how did that little guy get over here." I walk over to take a picture of him since he was so close. I get right in front of him and the little son of a bitch just jumps up, flapping his winds, and flies off to the pond. Damn duck almost killed me. Between the cat, which I swear is Dame Maggie Smith transfigurated, and birds in the country, some animal is going to do massive harm to me.

And then we went to the National Gallery for tea. All that was missing were cute old British ladies playing bridge (totally stereotyping, and probably false in addition so my appologies). I had my favorite tea in the world, Earl Grey Tea, which in all honestly I only had in my Aunt's chocolates before trying it today. In addition to that we also had a carott cake, ginger snaps, scones, egg salad, ham sandwiches, and what I think was chesse and chutney sandwiches? Best part was the view from which you can see all of central London.

Also, I don't think I mentioned this apparently Marie is Maria, since I just realized the cleaner can speak some sort of quasi-spanish. Me and her are now best buddies. It was kind of like my "Oh stewardess, I speak jive" moment when I realized she could speak Spanish.

Geoff and Eve are coming this weekend, should be amazing! Plus I will never have to use the PAWS room after tomorrow! So maybe, just maybe, I'll get some work done finally.

Oh and lets make this clear apparently Americans are so stupid because we elected "that actor" President. I'll leave it at that.

Sherlock Holmes Did Cocaine?

Yes, I did not know that but when doing the reading for Film Studies today I learned that Sherlock Holmes had a liking for cocaine and that Blake Edwards (Julie Andrew's husband) directed Breakfast at Tiffany's. This is how sad my life has become. But wait it gets sadder...

So the computer guy calls me today and says that my laptop has a motherboard problem because everytime he installs the new video card in it, the computer overpowers and just dies. He then proceedes to tell me that if I want that fixed it will cost £250 in addition to the service charge. I then asked him how long it would take he said, "I don't know I will call you back in a bit, but it will be long and £250. Cheers!" Then he hung up... Maybe its just me coming from the perspective of someone who does not say "cheers" on a daily basis, but saying that after telling me it's gonna cost me a shit ton to get my laptop fixed after not having it for a week was the equivalent of saying, "Ryan, I have bad news, grandma died...but have a great time at the funeral!"

I'm still waiting on the guy to call me back. Glad I'm not sitting by the phone or anything in anticipation. So now my newest plan is to buy a new laptop. Since the cheapest Mac here cost $1,300 and no I can't buy a computer from the US store in the UK I am buying one from Dell (again). Since I pay 75cents a minute on my phone I chatted with Dell online to call me since I discovered that I could not pay with a US debit card in the Dell UK store, and for some reason you can't buy them in any UK store. So I rush back from the PAWS room to get the phone call, give him all my personal information, and then you know what Raj (that was his real name) says to me, "Sorry sir your card is declined." And then I google maps, outlined the route to Tower Bridge and proceeded to jump off it...no in all honesty I didn't I just went back to the PAWS room and did it again after I got my bank to allow the charge. Only problem I still have yet to get that call back from Dell. I only have two papers due in the next two weeks but thats ok, take your time Dell.

So you know what was the highlight of my night? Going to Tesco at 9pm when everything is put on reduced!! Tonight's super deals included 19p pancakes and a tube of Quality Street we all split for only $4.50, original retail price £10.00. Yes reduced chocolate was my highlight. All I need is a tube of icecream and a British accent and gain about 50 pounds and I'll probably the male version of Bridget Jones given all the bad luck I have. Thank Jesus Geoff and Eve are coming this weekend!

You Talk Way Too Much

I was deciding on boycotting the blog until I got my laptop fixed but oh well I gave in. Ok WTF... First of all lets backtrack to Friday night. Who in their right civilized mind would ever think it is cool to cum (yes CUM as in ejaculate sperm) onto someone's door handle. It wasn't mine but really I swear I live with utter scumbags sometimes. I've also come to realize that while indie music is good to listen to on your ipod during rush hour on the tube, it is not my favorite kind of music to dance to and in all honesty I am over going to clubs like that. Plus they also play the same shit over and over and over. Just once, just ONCE I would love a club to play "I Like It" Enrique Inglesias, I don't know why but I am determined to hear that song played. The closest thing they play to a current pop song here in the UK is friggin "I Got A Feeling" by the Black Eyed Peas which last time I checked is so Summer 2009 or some of Rhianna's new shit, which quite honestly I am getting sick of. We know Chris Brown hit you, he's wortless, lets move on now...

Saturday I attempted to make custard. I just hate the metric system, safe to say it was an epic fail and came out like soup. From now on I am sticking to Jaffa Cakes.

Now to Sunday night. I went as Wolverine, which I must say looked pretty damn good. I don't have the pics uploaded yet since the laptop is still getting repaired. I was enjoying myself and my two liter bottle of Strongbow but then we went to this hot as balls club in London Bridge. First of all, London DJs stop stopping songs midway through and then restarting them. Secondly, AC was invented for a reason, we should really use it. I'm not a fan of sweating in a massive moshpit of people dressed up in halloween costumes with one hand not functioning because I have tinfoil claws attatched to them. Even the cheap alcohol did not justify the massive heat stroke I almost had because it was so damn hot in there. And then the trip home...I was just tired let's just leave it at that. I am sticking to Soho from now on for clubbing, more my scene.

Although this morning I woke up and probably went to class with eye liner still on but you know what I could care less. Tube delays caused me to almost be late for class. It took me an hour to get from Hampstead to Strand because of a signal failure (what else is new) on the Jubilee line. But then I got to class and Hermione was talking as usual, WAY TOO MUCH, but I've come to ignore that. Today Snape was going on about how the British are starting to say "Zee" instead of "Zed" in reference to the letter "Z" I swear the man is out to get me based on my twang...

So I think the moral of the story for all of this is you can't fix stupid.